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How to Tell if You are Obsessed with LotR


1. Everything on your Christmas List had something to do with LOTR.

2. You insist that Middle Earth really exists.

3. You really do eat second breakfast and elevensies.

4. You want to learn elvish as a second language.

5. You wish you had pointy ears like an elf.

6. You know at least 10 LOTR poems by heart.

7. Your parents take away your LOTR stuff as punishment when you do something bad.

8. You read stupid lists like this.

9. You write stupid lists like this.

10. You try to run on snow.

11. You seriously want to name your future children after charecters from LOTR.

12. You know the lyrics of every song in the soundtrack that has them. (even the elvish songs)

13. You act out scenes from the LOTR movies.

14. You ask the local restaurants why they don’t serve lembas bread.

15. You have plastered your bedroom wall with at least 25 LOTR posters.

16. You named your pets after characters from LOTR.

17. It irks you when people say bad stuff about LOTR, especially: “It was so boring I fell asleep.”

18. No one bothers to ask what you want for your birthday.

19. You have a nickname that has something to do with LOTR.

20. You respond to it.

21. All of your friends know the whole plot for LOTR even though they have never watched the movie.

22. Your friends find excuses to get away from you once you start talking about LOTR.

23. You can’t pass a day without thinking about LOTR.

24. You ride your bike up and down the street yelling, “Noro lim Asfoloth! Noro lim!”

25. You incorporate random parts of the LOTR script into your every day conversation.

26. Whenever you see something nice, you ask it’s owner, “Is it elven made?”

27. You have to bring your LOTR books/ movies wherever you go.

28. If someone shows absolutely no interest in LOTR, you scream at them and tell them they are insane.

29. You have read every single book that J.R.R. Tolkien ever wrote.

30. You write LOTR stories, poems, essays, etc.

31. You have a website dedicated to LOTR. (like I do)

32. You give an elvish name to every one of your friends and call them by it.

33. You can relate anything and everything to LOTR.

34. You wish that you lived in Middle Earth.

35. You tell the whole plot of LOTR to anyone who will listen.

36. You have read the books more then 5 times each.

37. You have watched the movies more then 5 times each.

38. You tell everyone you need sword lessons in case of orcs.

39. You know how to play at least one LOTR song on every instrument that you play.

40. You insult people in elvish when you’re mad at them (or even just for fun).